I have read a motivating story from the Buddha’s life about how to handle your own anger.
Angry Bharadvaja approached the Buddha and abused and hated him with harsh, foul words.
When he had finished speaking, the Buddha said to him: “What do you think, Bharadvaja? Do your friends and relatives, as well as guests come to visit you?”
“Sometimes they come to visit, Master”
“Do you then offer them some food or a meal or a snack?”
“Sometimes I do, Master.”
“But if they do not accept it from you, then to whom does the food belong to?”
“If they do not accept it from me, then the food still belongs to us.”
“So too, Bharadvaja, we – who do not neglect anyone, who do not scold anyone, who do not bar against anyone – refuse to accept from you the abuse and scolding and outburst you let loose at us. It still belongs to you, Bharadvaja! It still belongs to you, Bharadvaja!
“Bharadvaja, one who abuses his own abuser, who scolds the one who scolds him, who rails against the one who rails at him – he is said to take of the meal. But we do not take of your meal. It still belongs to you, Bhardvaja! It still belongs to you, Bharadvaja!”
“Do you then offer them some food or a meal or a snack?”
“Sometimes I do, Master.”
“But if they do not accept it from you, then to whom does the food belong to?”
“If they do not accept it from me, then the food still belongs to us.”
“So too, Bharadvaja, we – who do not neglect anyone, who do not scold anyone, who do not bar against anyone – refuse to accept from you the abuse and scolding and outburst you let loose at us. It still belongs to you, Bharadvaja! It still belongs to you, Bharadvaja!
“Bharadvaja, one who abuses his own abuser, who scolds the one who scolds him, who rails against the one who rails at him – he is said to take of the meal. But we do not take of your meal. It still belongs to you, Bhardvaja! It still belongs to you, Bharadvaja!”
Morale of the Story ---
… One who react with an angry man with anger
Thereby makes things bad for himself.
Not reacting an angry man with anger,
One wins a combat tough to WIN…
Thereby makes things bad for himself.
Not reacting an angry man with anger,
One wins a combat tough to WIN…
After this precious discussion with Lord Budha, Bharadvaja changed and becomes a monk, with Buddha’s guidance achieves Complete awakening.
Source - SN VII.2, tr. Bhikkhu Bodhi
